Anastacia was spotted in Mauritius lounging around in her bikini. I’m not really even sure who she is, but the paparazzi were following her so I suspect she might be famous. I think she’s a singer or something. Maybe a juggler. Either way she’s got giant boobs and is wearing a bikini. Last I checked that’s more than enough reason to post these. And also to shake my head side to side while making motorboat noises.

A ton more of Anastacia in her bikini after the jump.

NOTE: Usually looking like a dude negates the bikini factor, but I was desperate to put anything up after the Scary Spice post.

Original post by Suzi

Scary Spice Melanie Brown says she’s taking Eddie Murphy to court to force him to take a paternity test. She tells People:

“He’s not doing a DNA test and he’s not signing the birth certificate. So it’s going to have to go to court so he can be forced to do it, which is strange since he was the one asking for it.”

I’d refuse a DNA test too if it proved I had sex with this thing. If there was a way to get another woman pregnant by making out with your own mom, I’d rather admit to that than to having sex with Scary Spice.

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Original post by Suzi

Splash News

Britney Spears posed topless at a friend’s house last month with some flowers. And, uh, here they are. Although I have no idea why anybody is asking Britney Spears to get topless. Six years ago this would’ve been amazing, but now they could’ve put a seal in a silly hat and thrown some flowers at it and it would’ve turned out hotter. If it weren’t for the outfit, I wouldn’t even have been able to tell this was a girl.

NOTE: Yes, these are real. Very real, and very horrifying. If you get aroused by these you’re required by law to turn in your penis.

Original post by Suzi

After making her directorial debut at the Tribeca Film Festival last week, Angelina Jolie went to a party at Hotel Gansevoort and gave actor Olivier Martinez a lap dance after having some wine.

“She turned to him on the banquette and was shaking it in front of him. She was giving him a lap dance,” another reveler tells Us. “She was looking over her shoulder, tossing a glance his way.” As another partygoer describes it, “It was very, very flirty.”

Brad Pitt better get his woman under control. A wooden bat and a potato sack work great. Although personally, I like to use them on first dates. Nothing says romance like throwing a potato sack over a woman and clubbing them in the head. That’s right, ladies, I’m a charmer. Rowr!

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Original post by Suzi

Britney Spears performed in San Diego at the House of Blues yesterday, her first public concert appearance in nearly three years. She started off with “Baby One More Time” and performed for less than 15 minutes before thanking everybody for coming and playing a taped Madonna song as she exited.

The comeback didn’t hit a high note for everyone, some of whom paid upward of $125 a ticket. “It looked like she lip-synched her way through the whole thing,” said a disappointed Morgan Segall, 20, who flew in from San Francisco for the night.

I can’t believe people actually paid $125 to see Britney Spears sing for less than 15 minutes. Their money would’ve been better spent investing in my patent pending Trash Can Filled With Burning Money. I don’t want to get ahead of myself, but I expect it to win two or three Nobel prizes.

A ton more pictures and a video of her performance after the jump.

Original post by Suzi