After seeing the way she was coming across in the media, Paris Hilton released this press statement:

“After reading the media’s coverage of my court hearing, I feel the need to correct what I believe are misperceptions about me. I absolutely realize how serious driving under the influence is. I could not live with myself if anyone was injured or killed while I was driving while impaired. Clearly, no one should — no matter how slightly.

I am ready to face the consequences of violating probation.

No one is above the law. I surely am not. I do not expect to be treated better than anyone else who violated probation. However, my hope is that I will not be treated worse.”

I’d actually feel sorry for her if I didn’t know what a horrible human being she is. Don’t be fooled, this is the same spoiled racist bitch she’s always been. Watcing her cry is almost arousing. God forbid they ever get a video of her being eaten by hyenas, because I don’t think the world is ready for the raging boner it’d give me.

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Kirsten Dunst and Johnny Borrell reportedly cut past a long brunch line at Café Sabarsky, including several elderly couples.

“There were seven people ahead of her, including several elderly couples. She should have known better,” said one peeved eyewitness. But a rep for the eatery assured us that the “Spider-Man 3″ actress wasn’t playing the prima donna: “Miss Dunst had a reservation at the café, and those who have reservations do not have to wait.”

The only special treatment Kirsten Dunst should ever receive is getting her own personal cage at the zoo. And not because she’s special, but because if she’s put with the other animals they’ll just end up killing themselves.

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Instead of making an appearance at the premiere of her new film, Blonde & Blonder, at Cannes Film Festival, Pam Anderson is opting to stay at home with her boys, Brandon 10 and Dylan, 9; eating popcorn and laying in bed. Pam told People Magazine:

I’m having my own premiere with my kids, in my bed with popcorn.

Seems like a perfect holiday for Pam.

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Original post by Suzi

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Pamela Anderson was spotted in Agoura Hills wearing short shorts and a slightly see-through shirt. Which isn’t actually news, but it’s a super slow day so this is the kind of crap you’re going to have to deal with. The next celebrity to order lunch or get in their car will probably end up on the site.

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Kevin Federline has apparently been trash talking Britney Spears’ new boyfriend, musician Howie Day. A source says:

“When Kevin heard they had a sleepover at her house, everyone wanted to know about it. He lit up a cigarette and said he guessed you have to head to the dump to find trash, referring to how Britney and Howie met while in rehab.”

I’m not sure if Kevin Federline is the most qualified person to be calling other people trash. I’m pretty sure he’s more qualified to be an astronaut. Or, I dunno, a Japanese woman. Besides, one look at Britney Spears and you can tell this lady is all class. I’m surprised she didn’t have her monocle on here. She must’ve left it with her top hat.

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Angelina Jolie reportedly lost it when a photographer got pictures of her bathing her children. She and her family (including Brad Pitt) were in their rented home in Prague when a photographer took the photos of her through a raised shade. A security source says:

“She was livid. Angelina felt so sick and so violated, she was shouting and crying and shaking.”

Kind of makes you wonder what she was doing besides bathing her kids. She has to be used to being photographed by now, so the only reason I can see her freaking out is that she was doing something she shouldn’t have been doing. You know who else freaks out when they’re photographed? Mothers who eat their children. Ridiculous speculation? Or the shocking truth! Dum dum dum!

NOTE: Just kidding. Trying to get pictures of a bathing child automatically makes this photographer a closet pedophile.

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MTV movie awards have declared nominations for all the categories. Beyonce faces her co-star Jennifer Hudson once again for the best performance category. Hudson took the Oscars so let us see what happens this time around.

The ceremony will be hosted by US stand-up comedienne and actress Sarah Silverman and will take place on June 3. 2007 MTV Movie Awards nominations:

# Best Performance: Gerard Butler, 300; Johnny Depp, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest; Keira Knightley, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest; Jennifer Hudson, Dreamgirls; Beyoncé Knowles, Dreamgirls; Will Smith, The Pursuit of Happyness.

# Breakthrough Performance: Emily Blunt, The Devil Wears Prada; Abigail Breslin, Little Miss Sunshine; Lena Headey, 300; Columbus Short, Stomp the Yard; Jaden Smith, The Pursuit of Happyness; Justin Timberlake, Alpha Dog.

# Best Comedic Performance: Emily Blunt, The Devil Wears Prada; Sacha Baron Cohen, Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan; Will Ferrell, Blades of Glory; Adam Sandler, Click; Ben Stiller, Night at the Museum.

# Best Kiss: Cameron Diaz and Jude Law, The Holiday; Will Ferrell and Sacha Baron Cohen, Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby; Columbus Short and Meagan Good, Stomp The Yard; Mark Wahlberg and Elizabeth Banks, Invincible; Marlon Wayans and Brittany Daniel, Little Man.

# Best Villain: Tobin Bell, Saw III; Jack Nicholson, The Departed; Bill Nighy, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest; Rodrigo Santoro, 300; Meryl Streep, The Devil Wears Prada.

# Best Fight: Jack Black and Héctor Jiménez vs Los Duendes (Wrestling Match), Nacho Libre; Gerard Butler vs The Über Immortal (The Spartan/Persian Battle), 300; Sacha Baron Cohen vs Ken Davitian (Naked Wrestle Fight), Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan; Will Ferrell vs Jon Heder (Ice Rink Fight), Blades of Glory; Uma Thurman vs Anna Faris (Super Girl Fight), My Super Ex-Girlfriend.

Original post by axe