I’m not going to go so far as to say Paris Hilton used to look hot, but at least she never looked like she got done up by her grandma. I’m surprised she didn’t complete the look and show up to the 2007 MTV Video Music Awards in a pair of mom jeans and sneakers. When her hair dresser asked what look she was going for it’s like she pointed to her grandma and yelled, “Like that, but older!”

Original post by Suzi

Britney Spears was offered a second chance to perform on Extra who apparently felt bad about the pop star’s VMA performance. Ok! Magazine reports:

The folks over at Extra want Britney Spears to give performing her new single “Gimme More” another try. The show says they will open their studio stage up to her so that can she can try to prove to everyone she is ready for her comeback.

So what is the motto over at Extra? “Two train wrecks are better than one?” Do you think Britney will actually take the offer? You know, really lay off the booze, send Criss Angel packing and give it her all. Eh, who am I kidding? She’s at Burger King right now, crying her way through a second Whopper, wondering if she can get “Crossroads 2” green-lit. Ooh, a bit harsh? Yeah, I’m sorry, it’s just this new Braille keyboard. Last night my eyes got pissed and fled the country so I’m a tad bit salty. I’ll play nice. Like Britney’s kids are doing right now - in traffic. Sorry, sorry! Reflex action.

Original post by Suzi

Kanye West threw a tantrum after being shut out at the VMAs. While waiting for an elevator after the show, he started flipping out in front of the media and backstage crew about losing the five categories he was nominated in. He claims he’ll never return to MTV. The Associated Press reports:

“That’s two years in a row, man … give a black man a chance,” said West, stomping around his entourage and directing his comments at a reporter. “I’m trying hard man, I have the … No. 1 record, man.” It was the latest outburst from West at an awards show. Last year, he crashed the stage at the MTV Europe Awards after not winning for best video.

Is Kanye West menstruating? Is that the deal here? Is he feeling a bit crampy, bloated? Maybe he should take a nice hot bath, eat some chocolate and watch a little Lifetime. Tomorrow is a brand new day and he can go pick up that purse that keeps catching his eye. There’ll be another chance for a VMA, and next time Kanye West will win Best Female Artist which he’ll be eligible for. Because of his vagina.

Original post by Suzi

Kid Rock and Tommy Lee (who have both been married to Pamela Anderson) got into a fight during the 2007 MTV Video Music Awards last night. Rap producer Rich Nice witnessed the incident and told the AP:

“It looked like Tommy Lee initiated it because Kid Rock was ignoring him. And Tommy Lee kind of antagonized him. And then when Tommy Lee stood up, it looked a little weird, like ‘Yo, what?’ When Tommy stands up is when Kid hit him the first time with a backhand and then Tommy Lee looked like he was trying to get at him to aggressively retaliate and then Kid Rock hits Tommy Lee again — bong.”

Tommy Lee told The Insider his version of the story:

“I was minding myself and then he goes and punches me on the cheek,” claims Tommy. “I was trying to be the bigger man, but he was acting childish.” He added that after Kid came up and punched him, he “was ready to go in the alley and kick his ass. “I was about to put Kid in the emergency room when security grabbed me,” says Tommy. “They said, ‘If you move, we will break your arms.’”

Can this thing even be called a fight? Kid Rock has a cigar in his mouth the entire time. I’ve seen tougher fights at the petting zoo. And not even a real petting zoo. Just a bunch of stuffed animals I threw on the ground to entertain some babies. And how exactly was Tommy Lee planning on putting Kid Rock in the emergency room? Was it with the yelling or the walking away in shame? I usually just use punches, but maybe I’ll give his method a try.

Original post by Suzi

Paris Hilton announced that Christina Aguilera is pregnant to a crowded Club LAX in Las Vegas over the weekend. While Christina has been seen with a noticeable bump, she has not yet publicly confirmed the pregnancy. Fortunately saints like Paris Hilton exist and have no sense of decorum. Us Magazine reports:

“Congratulations to the most beautiful pregnant woman in the world, you’re gorgeous,” Hilton, 26, said to the packed crowd, while Aguilera, 26 (whose video ‘Candy Man’ is up for Best Director at the MTV VMAs) sat nearby in uncomfortable silence.

Paris then went on to announce other obvious facts including the sky is blue, the grass is green and she has herpes. And also something about my abs being incredibly chiseled. I believe “sculpted steel” were her exact words.

Original post by Suzi

Justin Timberlake’s short film “Dick in a Box” won a Creative Arts Emmy over the weekend. Justin made the film with SNL star Andy Samberg who gave the acceptance speech while Justin performed out of town in Vegas for the 2007 MTV VMA’s. TMZ reports:

“I think it’s safe to say that when we first set out to make this song, we were all thinking ‘Emmy!’” Samberg dedicated the award to a real “up and comer” - his “D*ck in a Box” creative partner, saying Timberlake’s “clearly very talented and could use a break. So, Justin, if you’re out there, congrats to you, kid.”

That’s nothing. Allow me to list just a few of the awards my wang has acquired over the years: Emmy for Best Actor in a Daytime TV Series, J.D. Powers and Associate Car of the Year, Largest Structure in the Galaxy Winner and a Nobel Peace Prize. Your genitals only serve waste and reproductive purposes? I’m ashamed to be talking to you.

Original post by Suzi

Britney Spears gave her “comeback” performance at the MTV Video Music Awards on Sunday night. MTV had threatened to pull the plug if Britney didn’t behave over the weekend in Las Vegas. Obviously MTV chose not to cancel because they love ratings music so much. NY Daily News reports:

“Britney knows she’s on thin ice. When they agreed to the performance, they sat her down and told her she should not be going out, and instead focus on rehearsing and resting,” an insider said. “She seemed to be thankful and appreciative for the chance, but who knows with her? MTV made it clear that her usual behavior will not be tolerated.”

Britney clearly heeded the warning - and spent the entire weekend partying :

The pop tart was spotted sipping a frozen margarita before her VMA rehearsal Friday. Then Spears showed up at Snoop Dogg’s bash at Body English in the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino about 1 a.m. yesterday in a cute, black strapless dress. She had her people immediately call man-of-the-moment Criss Angel to meet her, sources said. Spears has denied the two are dating.

One source said, “She’s totally phoning this in. She doesn’t seem to care how this goes. She’s been drinking a bunch and not putting her all into rehearsing.”

Supposedly Criss Angel was consulted about adding magic to the performance. What magic was that? The off-rhythm dancing? The fishnet stockings whose strength suggest a Kryptonian origin? Or maybe it was dark magic that struck fear into those who looked too closely. Christ, 50 Cent has been shot nine times and was scared shitless sitting in the front row. He’s probably been up all night, clutching his blanket in fear that the Jiggly Girl will sloppily dance out of the closet at any second. God knows I was. I kept a Big Mac on my nightstand so I could distract her with it and make my getaway.

Video of Britney Spears’ VMA performance as well as a ton more pictures after the jump.

Original post by Suzi