Elizabeth Hurley turned on some pink lights at London’s Selfridges yesterday to signify her support of Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Because, you know, nothing says I hate breast cancer like turning on some pink lights. And can you imagine if she didn’t turn those pink lights on? My God, people might get confused and think she loved breast cancer. That she, you know, throws parties in her basement dedicated to how awesome breast cancer is. Whew, it’s a good thing she got those lights on!

NOTE: Yeah, I’m stretching here, but nothing is going on today and I wanted an excuse to post these pictures of Elizabeth Hurley. Desperate situations call for desperate actions! Did I mention I just drank a cup of my own urine? Hydration is the name of the game, my friend.

Original post by Suzi

Orlando Bloom was involved in a wreck last night. After being cut off, He crashed his vehicle into a parked Porsche. He had two female passengers in the car that were both injured. Check out Orlando’s heroic actions immediately after the crash. TMZ reports:

In video taken immediately following this morning’s accident, Bloom can be seen walking away from the scene, leaving two women — one injured and bleeding — in his smashed-up ride. Nice guy!

After walking down the block, the paparazzi repeatedly advise Bloom to go back to the accident scene and “deal with it,” saying that if he leaves, it could be a hit and run.

Despite Orlando exhibiting erratic behavior after leaving the Green Room in Hollywood, police are ruling out drugs and alcohol as the cause of the accident, according to TMZ:

Police tell us that they did not administer a blood alcohol test at the scene, and would not say if one was given at all. But, they insist he was not under the influence.

So basically what the police are saying is that Orlando wasn’t drunk or high when he left two chicks bleeding in his car. This evidence confirms a theory I’ve long held about Orlando Bloom: He’s a giant pussy. But, let’s be serious for a moment. Orlando, I’m here for you. If you want to take my world-renowned hero classes, the door is always open. But it’s not for the weak. If you’re uncomfortable using your raw sexuality like I do to battle famine, disease and killer robots, you can always check out amateur pottery down the hall. It’s conveniently located next to the ladies room which I hear you’ve been to quite often - to pee sitting down.

NOTE: The above video is of Orlando leaving the Green Door in Hollywood about 15 minutes before the accident.

Original post by Suzi

It’s a slow news day, so here’s Beyonce at the Samsung press conference for her new B Phone with some tape on her boob. Or glue. A scar? Look, what am I, a glue tape scar expert? No. I’m just the guy that sits here bench pressing trucks while women throw themselves at me and ogle my muscles. Sometimes I also play with puppies.

Original post by Suzi

Lindsay Lohan’s father Michael Lohan apparently is a cheating bastard. A Long Island woman has been dating Michael for the past four months; only to find out he has a new girlfriend. Page Six reports:

“We fell in love - there was ‘I love you’ and everything. He told me that he was going to change my life. He’s very sexual, I thought we had great sex. Sex is very important with him.”
But this week, Michael began crowing about his new girlfriend Erin, a Lindsay look-alike, and pictures of them surfaced in Utah, where he was visiting his rehabbing daughter.

I’m actually not surprised that Michael Lohan is dating someone who looks just like his daughter. Not even fazed. I was however amused at this piece of information:

She says she was particularly jolted because Michael has become an ordained minister. “When he was melancholy once, I asked him, ‘Is there someone else in your life?’ He said, ‘Yes.’ I said, ‘Who is that?’ and he said, ‘God.’

I can almost hear Michael Lohan picking up chicks at the bar: “Oh yes, I’m very religious,” he’ll say. “In fact, I’m a minister. Would you like to come and pray with me? I’m building you a steeple right now – in my pants.” I’m almost 90% positive he stole that line from Moses. Or was it Noah? I’d open the Bible and check myself, but whenever I touch one, my hands start to burn and I hear this really deep laughing. I should probably get a new one, but with the traffic these days, I don’t know if it’s worth it.

Original post by Suzi

Britney Spears actually did appear in court yesterday to personally request overnight visits with her children. She had skipped the morning hearing, but decided it was time to make an appearance when the judge initially refused to grant overnight visits. E! Online reports:

Spears spent an hour answering the judge’s questions, before ducking down a back staircase and leaving the premises in her white Mercedes convertible.
Gordon apparently had a change of heart after the meet-and-greet with Spears. Earlier Thursday, he dismissed both legal teams without adjusting the visitation terms. He said he wanted to allow attorneys more time to discuss any proposed modifications.

Britney was granted one overnight visit a week, but under the watch of a court-appointed supervisor. Britney was hoping to have her mother serve as a monitor, but the judge wouldn’t allow it. He also didn’t see the children’s current visiting schedule as destructive, but found another source to be problematic – Britney:

“If a person’s dealing with challenges, and those challenges, including substance issues and emotional issues…some of the behaviors that accompany those challenges can have a devastating impact,” said Gordon, who has yet to get confirmation of Spears’ passed drug tests. “It has disintegrated from there because of choices made by your client.”

Britney Spears showed up in a court of law and the bailiff didn’t shoot her? What do I pay taxes for? If this judge really wanted to protect those kids, he would’ve put Britney on the witness stand and said, “My bailiff here would like to cross-examine you – with bullets!” Bam! Custody battle solved. Ironically, I proposed this same scenario at Harvard Law and they made me spend a week in a little room with this weird guy. He kept showing me ink blots that looked like Britney Spears vagina and Satan. I can never tell the two apart. That’s healthy, right?

Original post by Suzi

One should never approach Alba when she’s in a bad mood.

Reason being that they might feel humiliated just as the paparazzi had faced humiliation with Alba’s behavior.

Alba was surely in a bad mood when the Paparazzi spotted her. She was having lunch with a friend at Breadbar in Beverly Hills this afternoon, and when she saw the paparazzi she immediately changed her mood and covered her face with a newspaper.

Well, is that why celebrities carry newspapers for, to hide their faces if they see the paparazzi?

And finally when time came to leave, Alba flipped ‘em up the finger at the paparazzi and went away.

Original post by Sarah

Beyonce has disclosed the new Samsung phone.

The Samsung limited edition B’Phone, a Beyonce-branded version of the UpStage music phone originally introduced earlier this year.

It was shown at the Samsung store in New York’s time Warner building.

The handset features gold-and-burgundy colors designed by Beyonce, a Beyonce-themed startup screen.

It has also been included with a feature which can download exclusive Beyonce photos, videos and a song she recorded as a child.

Isn’t that cool!

Original post by Sarah